My Heart Drama...and I thought the Cancer Treatment Sucked!
(Hartsburg MO USA)
36 year old married, mother of 3 boys and a beautiful step-daughter. Diagnosed with Triple Negative Breast Cancer April 2010. After completing 8 rounds of chemotherapy... ACT,(4-Adramyacin, 4-Cytoxin, and
4-Taxotere)I started feeling worse than I felt, "during" treatment. After being hospitalized 4 times...I now have heart failure. Dialated Cardiomyopathy. I was one of those... "small percentage to hit the jackpot", I suppose. The Infusion folks did mention that heart failure was a possibility...but it was very rare. Really??? I recall shrugging that part off...In fact I do recall mentioning that it would suck to get through all the Cancer treatment & end up having a heart attack.
Some words should only remain as thoughts...and not as words that slip between the lips! So without a hobby...I lay around & sit at short intervals throughout my day...to pass the time. My "healing time". I was told I would heal...now they say I'm "stable". I try not to worry...in fact I usually don't think about it. When I do....I have my own little pity party & cry on my sweet little dog's shoulder. It starts off by one little tiny thought...the tears begin and I put my dog on my lap and pet her...and sob like a baby...and pet the dog...sob like a baby...and then realize I've practically rubbed all my dog's fur off while I was crying...LMAO! Like most mothers that have had breast cancer...that one thing that I pray to have....is seeing my children grow up...and being able to someday have grandchildren. I have learned to try and focus on some small little thing each day. It works...as long as you truly focus and have Faith. Prayers have their own form of medicine!
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